Back from the Dead

So, I'm not even sure if anyone is still following me but if so, stay tuned, I'll be back soon. 

Sad Puppy

So, making a long story short.  Little puppy hurt his back.  Not sure how it happened but $310 later we have painkiller for him so he can at least sleep.  It's been a rough couple days at our house.  It started when the pup would wake up yelping like we were butchering him alive.  It happened to coincide with a thunderstorm so we thought he may have been scared.  It kept happening and we took him to an emergency vet because his belly looked distended.  We left $80 poorer and no answers.  He got worse last night and hardly slept.  The mister took him to the vet this morning and they took x rays and there were no fractures or slipped discs.  So the vet concluded he pulled a muscle.  Sent him home with tramadol and he seems better after he took a nice long nap.  Poor guy, he sounded so awful.  It was torture listening to him howl and not being able to do anything for him.  I'm hoping the next few days he will be better.  When he isn't sleeping he plays like normal but we are trying to keep him as confined as possible without making him crazy.  It's going to take a few days for him to recover.  Ugh...I hate this. 

Work has been crazy.  We had AABB (American Association of Blood Banks) and the FDA show up this week.  We knew about AABB but the FDA can show up whenever they want and that's exactly what they have done. Awesome.

Food has been boring, or in other words, exactly how it needs to be.  Exercise has been intermittent since puppy arrived and nonexistent since he has been hurt.  Sigh...life happens I suppose.

Blah

My dinner tonight consisted of a sweet potato and a cheese stick.  My appetite has disappeared and when I am hungry, this is the kind of weird ass shit I've been eating.  I'm guessing this is a combo of metformin and no weight lifting. 

Sigh.  At least I have the cutest fucking puppy ever.

OMGPUPPIEZ

Been busy taking care of this little guy.  We picked him up on Thursday and have been "adjusting" ever since.  He has been pretty good.  He has only had a few accidents inside the house and it has always been on a piece of plastic that we have our plants sitting on. 

Crate training at night has not happened because when we put him in there he whines like we are butchering him alive. So he has been sleeping in between us.  It is OK now because he is only about 6lbs but this won't work so well when he is 90lbs.  I'm hoping to work on that this week if I can get my husband to stop giving into him.

I gotta get back to snuggling with my little fur ball.  :)

*ThumbsDownFartNoise*

That sums up my feelings for today.  I spoke too soon on the Metformin.  I woke up Sunday nauseated and continued to have waves of nausea all day long.  I never barfed but I sure as hell felt like I wanted to.  It hasn't really gone away yet but the waves have become less frequent.  Yesterday, I called out sick because I felt so shitty and proceeded to lay on the couch and watch Paranormal Witness on Netflix and scare the shit out of myself.  I've been trying to eat, especially when I take the pills but absolutely nothing is appetizing.  I wouldn't even eat pizza right now.  Now I know why it helps people lose weight, because if you feel like you're going to yak, you won't eat anything. 

As a result, I am taking a break from lifting weights this week because I could not handle lifting the way I do on an empty stomach while feeling like I want to hurl.  I'm going to continue to take the higher dose for another week and if it doesn't get any better, I'm going to have to call the doctor and see what I should do. 

We leave tomorrow to pick up our new puppy.  It is a 6 hour drive from where we are so we are staying in a hotel tomorrow night and will pick him up from the breeder on Thursday and head home. I have a feeling it will be a long trip home because we will have to stop and let him burn off some energy and do his business.  I'm off work half day tomorrow and through next week.  The director of the lab is freaking out because I will be gone along with our supervisor.  He's "not sure who he us going to talk to."  Apparently he has forgotten about the 5 other techs we have that keep this lab going every single day.  Whatever, I'll be on vacay.

I have been lurking around other blogs and everybody seems to be doing well.  Yay for not being fat!

Progress

At the beginning of May, I took my body measurements in hopes that those numbers would improve by the end of the month.  Well, some did, and some didn't but I'm happy with the ones that did.  Check 'em out...

            May 3, 2013                      June 1, 2013                           Change

Bust:        45"                                      42.25"                                  -2.75"

Chest:      39.7"                                    37.5"                                  -2.2"

Waist:      44"                                       41"                                      -3.0"

Hips:        47"                                       45"                                      -2.0"

L thigh:    27"                                       25.25"                                 -1.75"

R thigh:   28.5"                                    25.75"                                 -2.75"

L calf:      15"                                       15"                                          0

R calf:      15.5"                                    15.5"                                      0

L arm:      12"                                       12"                                          0

L forearm:   10"                                    10"                                         0

R forearm:   10.5"                                10.25"                                   -0.25"

Neck:        15"                                       14.5"                                     -0.5"

Weight:    183.8 lbs                              176.8 lbs                              -7 lbs

Actually now that I look at them, I am very satisfied.  The calf and forearm measurements, I could care less about, honestly.  The numbers for the arms, thighs, calves and forearms are all from a relaxed state.  I haven't lost enough body fat to calculate how much muscle I am creating.  Maybe one day I'll measure that but I don't really care about that either.  I just want to be healthy and strong.  

I'm pretty sure all most of these changes happened after I started taking Metformin.  I started that on May 17th.  The pants I wore to my doctor's appointment when I was prescribed the drug, on May 14th, fit better now than they did at that appointment.  For me, this is a wonder drug and I'm hoping once I hit my goals that I can stop taking it.  It is really fucking amazing how I do not crave sugar hardly at all anymore.  Before, I couldn't go one day without obsessing over having something sugary.  Fruit never cut it, but it does now.  Last night, I doubled my dose up to 1000mg, per the doctor's orders.  I got a little gassy and crampy, pooped a little more than usual today, and felt a little queasy this morning but once I ate I was fine.  Sorry, I know, TMI.  I haven't counted calories at all since I started the Metformin either.  I still measure out my portions of brown rice, quinoa, nuts and dried fruit though.  I feel like I don't have to count calories because I'm not eating a bunch of junk.  It's  a big weight lifted off me.  The more weight I lose though, I may have to start because I won't need as many calories as my weight starts to drop.  I'll worry about that when I get to that point though.

I went to Trader Joe's and Costco and between the two spent almost $300 this morning in food.  It was all healthy, no junk.  We hadn't been to Costco in a while so we stocked up.  

I'll be cleaning out my "office" today that has been a mess since we moved into our house 2 years ago.  My husband's patience is wearing thin because he is a neat freak and I am not.  I'm not dirty, I just tend to have clutter.  But, I feel I need to de-clutter and make more of an effort to not do that shit.  

So, 30 more days until more results are posted.  I'll probably weigh weekly just to be sure I'm not letting my calories get away from me.  I just have to keep on keepin' on and that fat will melt away...eventually.

YUM

I had to post pics of dinner because it was fucking amazing.  Behold...

Tomato and basil salad with olive oil and eggplant "manicotti."

Slices of eggplant replaced the pasta and it tasted just fine.  Dessert was a few strawberries and a few blackberries.

Mmmm!

Tuesday Funday

I had a nice long, much needed, holiday weekend.  Spent some time with the fam on Sunday and didn't eat a bunch of shit like I always used to do.  I denied a giant piece of Dairy Queen ice cream cake and nobody seemed to care.  I did eat a mett which is the first meat I have eaten in a few weeks.  I thought it would upset my stomach but I felt fine. 

I went to the gym yesterday around 11:00 am and it was so crowded.  I was annoyed but I tore shit up with a nice leg workout.  Leg workouts always make me feel strong because I have some beast legs.  The muscles have some insulation (read: fat) but when I flex they're pretty solid. 

This morning I was back to my usual morning routine.  I did chest, triceps and abs.  I have switched my routine to a 4-day split as opposed to 3 days.  I felt I needed more gym time.  I also did a little running on the treadmill afterwards.  I am running a 5K at the end of June with a friend and need to start gearing up for that.  It is one of those color runs where you get doused with powdered color stuff.  It is a fun one, no competition involved so we may walk part if it.  Plus there is a big festival afterwards so it should be a fun day. 

Now that I have been on metformin for a week I am definitely noticing some changes.  Normally about a week before my period is supposed to start I'd get ridiculous cravings for high fat, high sugar, high calorie foods.  I realized today is almost the end of the month which is when I usually start and I haven't had any significant cravings.  Yesterday there was about 20 minutes where I wanted a pop tart.  Not sure why but a pop tart sounded amazing.  I ate an apple with PB and flax and j was satisfied.  This has been the only craving I have noticed.  Before metformin, my insulin was always elevated so I'm sure that told my brain that I needed sugar when I really didn't.  It really is like night and day now.  I can walk by a plate of cookies or a bowl of candy and not think twice about not eating it.  Whereas I used to be like GIVEMESUGARNOWORYOUWILLDIE.  It's a good feeling.

This Friday since it is the end of May I will step on the scale and take measurements to see if I have made progress.  I know I have definitely lost inches because my clothes are fitting better.  I don't feel like a sausage anymore which is good.  I still have a long way to go though. 

Gag Me

This is a public note to the woman at my gym that peels off dead foot skin and leaves it in random places...

FUCKING STOP

You are a disgusting human being and I wish I could make you lick the shower floor where you left your fucking skin.  Fuck you and your nasty fucking feet.  Get a fucking pedicure. 

Another public note to the woman that insists on burning her hair with her flatiron every. single. morning....

YOUR HAIR LOOKS LIKE STRAW

You are a fucking idiot.  The smell of your hair burning makes me want to vomit and when I do it will be all over you.

And while you're at it, lay off the tanning.  Your skin looks like an old leather purse.  You are not a cougar either so stop acting like you're hot shit.

Can you yell I woke up in a pissy mood?  It's not just pissy, I felt the wrath of a thousand gods this morning when I saw a huge piece of dried out skin in the locker room and in the shower.  I think that's enough to make anybody crazy. 

Here's hoping that my day ends better than it has started.

Work, Work, Work

It has been a crazy work week this week.  Yesterday I worked 8-12:30, then I had to go back in at 10:30 and didn't finish up until 3:30 this morning.  I came home, in bed by 4:45 and back up by 8:30 and back to work by 10:00.  Fucking killer.  I'm heading to bed soon even though it is still light outside. 

I always bitch when I have to work weird hours like that but at least I know I'm doing something good.  I'd rather be the one delivering the bone marrow than the one waiting for it.  There has been a few occasions where families and parents of patients have come to see me when I drop off their transplants.  They are always so thankful and it makes working a crazy schedule worth it.  I'm thankful I'm healthy (relatively speaking) compared to our patients.  The chances of surviving a bone marrow transplant are on average, about 50%.  It is not an easy thing to endure and I'm amazed when I see some of our pediatric patients getting multiple transplants. 

Anyway, food has been good and exercise has been a little lacking this week but it is better than doing nothing. 
I have not had a sugary snack in over a week and the cravings are starting to go away. I think the idea that I could possibly end up with diabetes if I didn't take care of myself terrifies me.  No snack, no matter how delicious will ever be worth my health.  I always knew this but was never strict with myself until now.  I needed a good kick in the ass and I'm sure I'll continue to need ass-kickings. 

Two weeks from today and we will be new puppy parents!  We already have our name picked out! 

Tomorrow is Friday, fuck yeah!

LOLZ

I don't know why this picture makes me giggle but it does.  I needed giggles today because MONDAY.  Work wasn't so bad, thankfully.  I thought I got a liquid nitrogen burn but when I took off my glove, it was just cherry red..for like an hour.  As it turns out, the gloves that are supposed to protect my hands don't protect them if they are submerged in LN2.  Oops.

Food was good.  Breakfast was a green smoothie, lunch was Moroccan bean stew with quinoa, cottage cheese and a kiwi, snack was cashews, sunflower seeds and some dried apricots and we had some kick-ass sushi for dinner.

The metformin is definitely working and I didn't realize it until today.  Usually when I'm at work, I get ravenous by about 2:30 or 3:00 and my afternoon snack would just barely take the edge off.  Well, today, I got some hunger pangs about that time but I didn't feel like I could eat a Chipotle burrito the size of my head.  It is really helping to stabilize my blood sugar levels and as a result, I do not feel hungry all the time like I used to.  I have even noticed that I get fuller faster.  Tonight I had two sushi rolls, one of which had no rice, and I felt like I was going to burst.  I used to eat at least 3, sometimes 4 if I was really hungry.  This is gonna get good...stay tuned.

Finally feeling back to normal at the gym this morning, although I did not lift as heavy as I have been.  I was at about 75%.  By the end of the week, I'll be back up to my normal weights.  There was a grown-ass man wearing a Spiderman t-shirt at the gym.  The kind of shirt that looked like Spiderman's outfit.  It was amusing until I realized he was like 40.  Then it was just odd but I don't exactly make fashion statements when I'm at the gym either.  I'm usually in baggy shorts and an XL t-shirt.  Nobody needs to see my goods jiggling.  I daydream about the day when I can wear the cute tank tops to the gym and not feel like a whale.  I'll get there.  

Tomorrow is Tuesday and I'm starting to count down the days to when we get our new puppy (June 6th).  I'm so fucking excited because they are so fucking cute.  I want all of them but I'm sure I'll have my hands full with one puppy.   

Good night y'all.

Quackery

First of all, I'd like to thank everybody for the well wishes and encouragement.  I definitely need some of that right now and it means a lot to me.  I am feeling a hundred times better than last Sunday.  Fucking flu.  Who gets the flu in May?!  Ugh...

As I was eating breakfast this morning (veggie omelette and fruit salad), I remembered about this book I had about a low GI diet.  I borrowed it from a friend in a whirlwind idea I had of actually following it.  Obviously, I did not.  I didn't even really read it but I thumbed through it this morning and I found this gem, among others.  Listed below is in the chapter titled "Grocery List."  I had to take a picture because I knew you all would think I was nuts but it's laid out right there.  Apparently candy bars are good "snacks" on a low GI diet.  Not pictured is another section titled, "sustaining snacks," which included ice cream (low fat, of course), milkshakes, and oatmeal cookies.  I think I'll be returning this book to my friend and telling her to throw it away.  

I got my test results back yesterday and my insulin value was 51.  Normal is 2-24.  Epic fail.  C-peptide was also high though I don't remember than one off the top of my head.  My first day of metformin, the only side effect I noticed was (TMI AHEAD) a bit of loose poo.  Nothing awful, just noticeable.  Today, after my second dose last night, I haven't noticed anything.  I am so relieved.  I'll be on 500mg for two weeks then increase to 1000mg.  I have another round of labs to be drawn before I see the doctor again in three months and I'm hoping those numbers will decrease.  If I eat the way I know I should be eating, I don't think I'll have any problems getting that done.  

The worst part about this change is going to be all the bullshit I will hear from family, friends, co-workers, etc. about not eating shit.  I'm really not looking forward to it.  I need to keep reminding myself to not give a fuck about what everybody says.  

I'm taking it easy today, trying to find some low carb vegetarian recipes.  It's pretty damn hot today so we might save our walk for after dinner when it is a bit cooler outside.  

Back to work tomorrow.  Boo.

It's Official...

...I'm Fat.  Well, we all already knew that.  The diagnosis of PCOS is official as of Tuesday morning.  I saw an endocrinologist and he said based on my history and current symptoms I definitely have it.  I also may be insulin resistant and now I'm terrified.  He gave me metformin to take and I haven't taken it yet because I read about everybody's horror stories on the web.  He gave me the extended release version which is supposed to ease the side effects.  God, I hope so.  Now, I am to watch the carbs, no more than 40-50g per meal as per the doc.  I was also told to keep up the exercise and I'll see him again in three months.  They took 8 tubes of blood and he ordered like ten blood tests so the results of those will confirm the insulin resistance, if I actually have it.  I most likely do.  I'm really bummed.  I kinda always knew I was but was in denial because only unhealthy fat people have blood glucose/insulin problems.  I don't know what the fuck I was thinking.  I am fat and semi-healthy.  Minus the fat.  My first dose of metformin will be tonight after dinner.  I wanted to take it over a weekend when I wasn't at work in case my ass falls out from diarrhea or I double over in stomach pain.  I'm hoping not but there are some bad stories out there from women who have taken it.  I need to stop reading those.  

I think the flu has run its course as of Wednesday.  I went to work and felt OK.  I am easing myself back into my normal diet.  If I did it all at once, all the fiber I usually eat would clean me out all at once.  I don't want that in combination with the metformin.

Not much else going on around here.  I was picked to submit an abstract to possibly have the opportunity to present it at a meeting in the fall.  It's in Philadelphia, too!  So, I'd actually get a chance to rub elbows with some other cell therapy nerds.  I hope it goes through.  I'm actually really excited about the opportunity.  We'll see what happens...

I haven't been blog-lurking as much as I was.  The flu really kicked my ass.  I literally spent about 4 days on the couch doing nothing because I felt like death.  I'm pretty sure I watched every single movie and/or TV show on Netflix.  Tomorrow I'm going to the gym and attempting a light workout.  I should be OK, as long as I have enough calories on board.  

Ugh...I hate being fat.  

Update

Still alive here...

I slept most of the day except for about 20 minutes when I tried to take a walk.  I felt like I was going to pass out so that was a bust. 

Kidney stone passed Saturday, just in time for the flu to hit me.  The flu shot I got was worthless so I'm glad I got that. 

The only positive thing about being sick is not thinking about food.  I have no appetite to speak of and my diet has consisted of ginger ale, OJ, bananas, water and plain toast.  My husband has to remind me to eat.  I rarely forget to eat.  I wish this happened all the time. 

I still haven't stepped on the scale even though I'm sure I have "lost" a few pounds.  They will come right back when I start eating normal food again. 

I'm hoping I start to feel better tomorrow.  Anything better than "death warmed over" would be much appreciated.

Really...

As if kidney stones weren't enough...

A second trip to the ER yesterday with fever and bone-rattling chills revealed the flu with bronchitis. 

I never get sick.

Fuck my life.

Bloggus Interruptus

BRB...trying to pass kidney stones.

Day 8 - Dinner and Recap

As I said in my earlier post yesterday I met some friends at McAllister's for dinner.  I the savannah chopped salad and it was pretty good.  It had almonds, cranberries, gorgonzola, chicken and a nice vinaigrette of which I only used about a tablespoon.  By the time I met them I was starving and in my mild hypoglycemic state I forgot to take a picture but the picture shown below is the salad I had from their website.

I got home later than I wanted to but it was nice to catch up with them.  I don't see my friends as often as I'd like to. 

I had to pack my dinner/lunch for today and tomorrow when I got home so I didn't get to bed until around 11:30.  I have to work late tonight but came in early for a meeting that nobody showed up to so that's fucking awesome.  But at least I'll rack up a few hours of overtime today so I may leave early tomorrow.  I was picked to attend a luncheon at work today so I have no idea what type of food will be served but I think it will be a little fancier than boxed lunches.  My usual lunch will actually be my dinner tonight. 

Breakfast today is shown and I'm back to my green smoothie.  3 large strawberries, 1/2 cup yogurt, 1 scoop protein powder, 1/2 banana, 1/2 cup water and a couple handfuls of spinach.  The only problem is I drank it without taking a picture.  You would think after a week of doing this I would remember. 

Day 8 - Food Pics

Breakfast was a smoothie made with 3 large strawberries, 1/2 cup yogurt, 1/2 cup water, 1/2 banana and 1 scoop protein powder.  I also had 1/2 banana with a tablespoon of peanut butter before my workout. 

Lunch will be a repeat of yesterday.  Spinach salad with veggies and red wine vinegar/EVOO.  1/2 cup cottage cheese, roasted butternut squash, 2 hardboiled eggs and 2 small kiwi. 

Snacks, if i need them, are sunflower seeds, raw cashews and a gala apple.

I'm meeting some friends for dinner at McAllister's tonight and I have already planned what I am going to eat.  My usual choice there is a grilled chicken Caesar wrap with mashed taters and gravy and sweet tea but that meal is over 1,000 calories so I will not be eating that.  I'm going with a large salad or half salad and a cup of veggie chili. 

Work has been a clusterfuck today and that's all I'm going to say about that.  I need the day to be over right now.

Day 7 - Food Pics (continued again)

Dinner consisted of 1/2 cup whole wheat penned with 1/2 cup tofu, 1/2 cup marinara and a sprinkle of Romano.  I also had 1/4 sweet potato just because it was in the fridge and needed to be eaten. 

We walked a little over three miles at the park and just as we were leaving it started pouring rain.  It was pretty cloudy the whole time so we just beat the rain.

Food is done until tomorrow.

Day 7 - Food Pics (continued)

I ended up eating my Gala apple and sunflower seeds earlier than usual at work so I needed something when I got home and it was the last of the hummus which was probably 2-3 tablespoons, clif fruit rope and 7 kashi crackers.  I didn't eat the raw cashews I had pictured earlier because hummus sounded better.

We are getting ready to go on a walk at a local park and it should last at least an hour or so.

I would give my first born for a bacon cheeseburger right now but I won't eat it because I would have to take a picture of it.  Thanks estrogen, you're a fucking bitch. 

Day 7 - Food Pics

I took a picture of breakfast and lunch before I packed everything up this morning. 

I didn't feel like making a smoothie his morning so I had a Cherry Cobbler Larabar and 1/2 cup yogurt with half a banana, teaspoon of honey and sprinkle of cinnamon.  For some reason the yogurt gave me heartburn.  Pineapple is the only other thing that gives me heartburn.  It has happened before so I guess yogurt is best for me blended into a smoothie. 

Lunch was a repeat of yesterday.  2 hardboiled eggs, spinach salad with veggies and red wine vinegar/olive oil, butternut squash and 1/2 cup cottage cheese.

Also pictured is my water bottle.  It is 2.2 liters and is usually gone before I leave work.  When I get home I probably drink at least 32 more ounces.  I pee a lot.  If I know I'm going to be stuck in the lab, I try not to drink as much because it is a pain in the ass to go in and out.  If I don't drink enough water though, my body definitely notices. 

I threw some snacks in there but I'm not sure I'll have all of them.  Gala apple, 1 oz sunflower seeds and 1 oz raw cashews. 

I'll update later with dinner.  I'm planning on a long walk today with the Mister.  I'll try and escape my desk for a bit this afternoon and take a quick walk around the block. 

Day 6 - Food Pics

Dinner consisted of 1 cup whole wheat penned, 1/2 cup marinara, 3/4 cup tofu, a pike of veggies and a sprinkle or Romano cheese.  I washed it down with a summer shandy.  I only have one of these left so I may save it for Friday night. 

I'm sleepy tonight so I'll be crashing early.  Like right now early.

See y'all on the flip side.

Day 6 - Food Pics

Lunch was just about the same as last week. Two hard-boiled eggs, spinach salad with green pepper and radish topped with EVOO and balsamic vinegar, 1/2 cup cottage cheese and about 1 cup roasted butternut squash (glorious). 

One of my coworkers just returned from Peru and she brought me some chocolates with coconut in the middle. Kind of like a Mounds bar.  I had one after lunch and it was just enough.  It was about the size of a quarter in diameter.  I was hoping to take a quick walk outside but of course it is raining so I'm stuck walking the basement tunnels of an adjacent hospital.  Boring.

I didn't have my usual morning snack of cashews.  I think the avocado in the smoothie helped tide me over.  I may have to get used to this taste or maybe try throwing in pineapple or some other acidic fruit to balance the creaminess.  It was definitely a big difference.  Usually I am shaky by about 10:30 but I sailed right through until noon today and I busted ass at the gym this morning.

I just realized my second egg is just barely visible to the left of my salad container.  I cut one up and put it on the salad but didn't have enough room for the second one.

Lots of veggies today! 

Day 6 - Food Pics

I threw in half an avocado in my smoothie this morning.  It was...OK...kind of weird tasting.  It made it really thick and creamy though so it was like drinking a milkshake.  I threw in two strawberries, a splash of OJ, 1/2 cup yogurt, 1 scoop protein powder and some water along with the avocado.  This made a little more than usual so I had the remainder which was about 1/3 cup before my workout.  It actually tasted better after it sat a while or maybe I just didn't care because I was ravenous and sucked it down quickly. 

Workout today was legs and I'm definitely feeling it.  I arrived late, at 7:20, so I had to hustle through to get to work at a decent time.  Thankfully my bosses aren't strict about arrival time but I don't like to get there much past 8:30 because then I have to stay later.  I think a pulled a muscle doing lunges this morning right where my butt cheek meets my leg.  I'll have a nice long stretch session when I get home today and make the Mister rub it for me :)

I am itching to step on the scale but I have been restraining myself.  I was weighing daily and the normal fluctuations were starting to bum me out so I figured a month off from the scale would be a good idea.  I recorded a starting weight and some measurements so hopefully by the end of the month some of those numbers will go down. 

Period is starting this week which is always a great fucking time. 

Happy Fucking Monday.

Day 5 - Food Pics (continued)

Lunch was a cheese sandwich on one piece of whole wheat bread with about 2 teaspoons each of Dijon and vegenaise with sharp cheddar, tomato and spinach.  One kiwi on the side.

Dinner was takeout from one of our favorite Japanese places.  We split the tempura appetizer, chicken teriyaki, Philadelphia roll, miso soup and seaweed salad.  I ate two pieces of tempura and tried to shake off as much teriyaki sauce as I could.  Also another summer shandy.  We actually do own a table but most of the time we end up eating in front of the TV.  It's a bad habit we are just too lazy to break right now.

Since it rained all fucking day today, the Mister and I spent the afternoon naked "relaxing."  We were due for a day like today and it was much needed.  It felt like when we were first dating!  I got a nice massage out of it too.  

I managed to get a majority of food for lunches prepared for the week.  I only had enough spinach to make salads for three days so I made those with some cut veggies.  I measured out cottage cheese and nuts and hard-boiled some eggs.  I may make egg salad at some point this week but I didn't feel like it tonight.  I also didn't make my breakfast smoothie like I usually do because since I ran out of spinach, I thought I would throw in an avocado and I was afraid to make it the night ahead in fear the avocado would make it taste weird if it sat overnight.  I'll try it out on a weekend when I'm not depending on the smoothie being good the next morning.  If I didn't have my breakfast smoothie I'd be stuck with buying a plastic tub of cereal, donuts, or some sort of high calorie breakfast sandwich from the cafeteria.  Gross.  

Last week at the grocery, I accidentally grabbed a butternut squash instead of spaghetti squash.  I was in a hurry and apparently since the two look so similar (sarcasm), I grabbed the wrong one.  Anyway, it turned out to be awesome because I cut, peeled and roasted that bitch up today and it was fucking amazing.  Just a drizzle of olive oil, salt and pepper and about 30 minutes in the oven and I was having a mouthgasm and trying not to burn my tongue.  I will definitely be buying these more often.  While I was prepping it for the oven, I verbally expressed my curiosity as to why some vegetables resemble phallic objects.  Then I made a suggestive motion with it.  I know.  I'm like a teenaged girl sometimes with the sex humor.  But seriously, it looked exactly like a penis and balls.  I almost took a picture to post it on here but I restrained myself decided not to. 

So, until tomorrow...

Day 5 - Food Pics

Breakfast today was an experiment.  Not the coffee but the "low carb pancakes" I attempted.  

My coffee was 3/4 cup strong-brewed decaf with 1/2 cup milk and 2 tablespoons Silk French Vanilla creamer wit 1/2 packet Stevia in the Raw.  I drank it out of my favorite cup and yes, it says "E = mc2" and yes there is a picture of Einstein on the opposite side.  Yes, I'm that nerdy awesome.

So the "pancakes" were not as bad as I had originally thought they would be.  I found a recipe online and all it called for was 2 oz. cream cheese, 2 eggs and a splash of vanilla extract.  They were more like crepes and the texture was kind of weird.  I topped them with a dusting of powdered sugar and some strawberry "syrup" I whipped up.  That was the easy part, a handful of frozen strawberries, mashed up and boiled down a bit.  They tasted a lot better with the strawberry topping.  I doubt I'll make these again but at least I don't have that ihatemylifecarbcoma like you get with regular pancakes.  

I've been trying to keep up with everybody's food pics and it's looking good.  I'm proud of everybody for being honest even if the food choice was not so healthy.  Shit happens.  

Day 4 - Food Pics

Today was uneventful.  All I ate was breakfast and dinner.  I didn't have much of an appetite but I'm not questioning why. 

I had a bigger breakfast than usual.  Two eggs with some Monterey jack cheese and spinach with 1/4 sweet potato, 1 small kiwi and a few pieces if pineapple.  I also had 2/3 cup orange juice.  I typically don't waste my calories in juice but it sounded good this morning.

I was in the mood to cook so I made one of my absolute favorite things. Caramelized onion and mushroom white pizza.  It is definitely a labor of love.  It takes at least an hour and a half to make but it is so worth it.  I haven't made this pizza since I have been "dieting" and it tasted even better than it used to.  All homemade by the way including the crust.  I had 3 pieces which are probably the equivalent of 1.5 pieces of delivery pizza, size wise.  I also had a summer shandy.  Today was definitely not a typical food day for me.

Tomorrow is Sunday which means the next day is Monday. 

Ugh...

Day 3 - Dinner

You all better hold on to your butts because once you see my dinner, you're gonna me knocking my door down for the recipe.  But, no need, I'll give it to you right now...

1/2 cup cottage cheese
1/2 cup no sugar added applesauce

Yep. That was dinner.  I came home from work, did a few things then laid down on the couch and out on a movie.  The next thing I know it is 9:00 and my husband is waking me up making sure I'm still alive.  I didn't just nap, I had a near-death experience.

Amazingly when I woke up I wasn't very hungry but figured I should eat something or else I would wake up ravenous tomorrow. 

My combo may look gross but it is a throw back to my childhood.  My grandma used to give it to me all the time.  Except she used the sugary applesauce. 

I'm actually still sleepy so I'm not going to be up much longer.  I guess this is what happens when I only get about 6 hours of sleep each night during the week.  I have always needed more sleep than the average person. 

Good night y'all!

TGIF - Day 3 Food Pics

I am so glad it is Friday, y'all.  This morning at the gym I was having trouble adding up how much weight I had on the bar.  It took me about 20 seconds to realize that 50+50+45 = 145.  My week needs to be over.

Pre-workout fuel was a piece of banana that was a little less than half with a little less than 1 tablespoon of peanut butter.

Lunch and snacks are all pictured together again.  Green smoothie for breakfast, spinach salad with veggies, 2 hardboiled eggs, 1/2 cup cottage cheese, 1 cup pineapple and balsamic/EVOO for lunch. 

Snacks will be 1 oz raw cashews, 1 oz sunflower seeds and 1 gala apple.

This morning was a "pull" day at the gym so I did dead lifts, modified pull-ups, DB rows and back hyperextensions.  It felt good. 

I am on call this weekend which means I may be stuck working all weekend.  Gross.  I have my fingers crossed for no work!

Day 2 - Dinner pics

It looks like the picture is upside down but that's OK.  I had 1/2 cup pinto beans that were cooked with spices and onion, topped with about 1/8 cup Monterey Jack cheese and chipotle tabasco with 1/2 avocado mixed with lime juice and a pinch of salt and 1/2 sweet potato. It looks like way more than 1/2 cup of beans but i promise it isn't.  They really spread out after i microwaved them!  Kind of an odd combo but it's healthy.

Pineapples were on sale this week so I bought one today and cut it up and it was amazing.  So I had about a cup of that after dinner. 

We took a nice walk today on the mountain bike trails again.  We walked on a different one and it seemed like there hadn't been any bikers on it in a while because it was a little overgrown in places.  Also, I saw a fat girl on a mountain bike so now I feel better about buying one.  All I have ever seen is skinny people riding their bikes.  No judgement, just an observation.  I'm sure when I start riding, people will probably say the same thing about me and I could give a shit if they do. 

Tomorrow morning will be a weights session and maybe another walk after work.

It's almost the weekend!  I can't fucking wait!

Day 2 - Food Pics

Today I decided I would picture everything at once so included in that picture is breakfast, lunch and morning and afternoon snacks.  It is pretty much the same as yesterday but I'll spell it out.

Breakfast green smoothie: 1/2 cup water, 1/2 cup plain yogurt, 3 large strawberries, 1 scoop warrior blend protein, 1 handful spinach.

Morning snack: 1 oz raw cashew pieces

Lunch: spinach salad with bell pepper, carrots and radishes with balsamic vinegar and about 2 teaspoons EVOO, 2 hardboiled eggs, 1/2 cup cottage cheese, 1 mandarin orange.

Afternoon snack: 1 gala apple and 1 oz sunflower seeds

I only lift weights on Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings and I usually try and walk or swim on the other days.  This morning my "workout" consisted of lugging around liquid nitrogen tanks.  They are 800-900lbs pounds when they're full and about 600-700lbs when they're empty.  They do have wheels which is the only reason i am able to move them.  So, they can be a giant pain in the ass, literally, but it felt nice to man-handle them and realize my weight lifting is paying off!

My allergies are in full swing and the headache I went to bed with last night was still present this morning.  As soon as I sat up out of bed, my head started to pound.  Ugh.  I took one Aleve so hopefully that does the trick.  I may have to resort to taking an actual allergy pill. 

Allan mentioned on his post today that this challenge is a way to be accountable and a way for us to realize why we are fat.  Had we started this challenge a week ago, you would be seeing brownies, ice cream, Thai food, etc.  However, the start of this challenge coincided with my own challenge to kick sugar and lower my carb intake.  So, hopefully, most of the foods I will be showing will be the healthy choices. 

I will be adding dinner later which may be leftover stir fry from last night.

Day 1 - Food Pics

Pre-workout was about 1 tablespoon of peanut butter.

Breakfast (in the car) was a green smoothie made with 1/2 cup of water, 1/2 cup plain yogurt, 3 large strawberries, 1 scoop sun warrior protein powder, and 2 handfuls of spinach.

Mid morning snack was 1/2 oz. Raw cashew pieces (I'll probably finish these off this afternoon with an apple).

Lunch was a spinach salad with red pepper, carrot and radishes drizzled with EVOO and balsamic vinegar.  1/2 cup 2% cottage cheese, 2 hardboiled eggs, 1/2 oz raw sunflower seeds and 1/2 oz roasted sunflower seeds.

This is it so far along with about 1 liter of water.  I'll edit later to add dinner and afternoon snack!

Afternoon snack was an apple and the rest of my cashews.  I forgot to take a pic of the apple. FAIL. 

Dinner was 1/2 cup quinoa, 3/4 cup of tofu, and a giant pile of sauteed veggies.  This is a common dinner in my household because it's easy and fast. 

I used my new food processor that I got this week and not only didn't chop the veggies it damn near turned them into pulp.  Oops.  I guess this will require a learning curve!

I had a massive headache this afternoon and I assume it was a result of my sugar detox.  Ugh.  Fucking sugar.  It's evil. 

I couldn't shake my sugar craving and I was thisclose to eating a brownie but I saw I had a kiwi in the fruit bowl so I cut that up and threw in some blackberries.  Crisis averted.

Ew! And Allan's Challenge

More on this later...

ETA:  In response to the above article...well, I don't have much of one.  The way our country produces food is so flawed that I can't even begin to write on that topic because it will turn into a political rant.  I'd be curious to know what the food borne illness stats are for the EU because I know their food safety regulations are a lot tighter than the US regarding GMOs and additives.  In Europe, food that contains GMO has to be labeled appropriately and some of the additives used in food in the U.S. that are considered GRAS (Generally Recognized As Safe) by the FDA are banned in Europe.  What a shame.  No wonder people are always so sick; they are eating chemicals that our body does not know how to process.  I have a book that lists all of the approved food additives and there are over 14,000 used in the U.S.

Anyway, change of topic!  I joined Allan's challenge at the last minute tonight.  So, as most of you know, I will be posting pics of everything that goes into my mouth (THATSWHATSHESAID) before I eat it.  This also coincides with my version of Whole30.  I am cutting out added sugar (fruit is OK), limiting my fruit servings to 2 per day and reducing carbs.  I don't have a specific carb amount and I'm not sure I'll set one.  

My "last meal" tonight was a Chipotle bowl and a Sparkling Clementine Izze Soda (fuck yeah).  I usually scarf these down like it really is my last meal but I only finished about 2/3 to 3/4 of it.  Now I feel like I'm going to explode.  I used to love this feeling and now I just feel like I'm going to be sick.  Ugh.  Lesson learned.  

We took a long ass walk today on some mountain bike trails at a local park.  My pedometer read approximately 2800 steps before we started and when we got home, it read about 14,800.  It felt good but I felt disgusting and sticky afterwards.  We checked each other for ticks when we got home because I do not want a repeat of last week.  I still have that little bastard in my freezer.  I kept it in case I got sick but I think I'm in the clear now.

Tomorrow will be my last weigh-in for a month and I'd also like to take some body measurements.  Probably belly button, biceps (relaxed and flexed), thighs, bust and shoulders (can these be measured?).  

Hey, What Happened?

Stupid Blogger app for android just deleted the post I wrote last night.  Ugh.  Pain in the ass.  I had pictures of the delicious vegan brownies and vegetarian enchiladas I made this weekend. All from scratch, too.  You'll have to use your imagination to visualize how tasty they looked. 

Anyway, today I started a new workout routine.  I'm doing a 3-day split.  Legs, push, pull.  Simple, quick and efficient.  I destroyed my quads and glutes doing lunges.  My legs and ass feel like jelly but that's a good thing.  I need the reminder that I'm still not even close to my goals.  So, here is what went down at the gym this morning...

Squat 95x8, 115x7, 135x6
Lunges 3x10 - I barely squeezed out the last set.  My legs were toast.
Stiff leg dead lift 45x8, 65x8, 75x8 - these all felt easy but I didn't want to go heavy on the first day of doing a new exercise. I know what I can handle now so this will take a big jump next week.
Calf raises 2x15

As you can see, a very easy routine.  I got to the gym pretty late this morning and didn't have time to do much else but in the future I will be adding in at least 15 minutes of cardio or HIIT after the weights.  So I'll need to get my ass out of bed at a decent time in the morning. 

Breakfast was a green smoothie with:
1/2 c water (goodbye soy milk, sniff sniff)
1/2 c homemade Greek yogurt
3 large frozen strawberries
1 scoop raw vegan protein powder
Couple hand fulls of baby spinach

Lunch will be leftover enchiladas and dinner will either be a salad or eggs with some of the pinto beans I made over the weekend. 

I did some research on the Whole30 plan and they actually have a modified plan for vegetarians.  It allows dairy and some protein alternatives.  I'm not sure how specific I want to be with the program.  Right now, my goals are to eliminate sources of added sugar and reduce carbs.  This includes soy milk and my occasional Starbucks drink and honey.  I will also limit fruit to two servings per day.  I have to figure out what a serving of fruit is because right now, I have no limit.  I think this will force me to eat more veggies and that is a good thing!  My sweet tooth has always gotten me in trouble and I need to rein myself in.  I am also going to lower my carb intake.  I think this will help with the sugar cravings.  I tend to default to pasta a lot because it is fucking delicious and so versatile.  I never eat more than one serving (at least not now) which is about a cup so that's good, but it needs to go for a while. 

Today I will be scavenging the web for low carb vegetarian or vegan recipes.  I found the most amazing Brussels sprouts recipe that I will have to try at some point; garlic and herb stuffed Brussels sprouts! 

I went and looked at bikes this weekend and I'm going to have to convince myself that spending $650 on a nice bike that will last the rest of my life is worth it. 

Until next time...

Happy Fucking Monday!

"Because I'm Good Enough, I'm Smart Enough And..."

"...Dog-gonnit, people like me."

This year's Lab Week celebration has actually been very nice.  We were treated to a pizza lunch today (of course) and they gave every lab person a nice stainless steel water bottle.  I ate one small slice of veggie pizza and a giant salad.  Someone made cookies that had the ABO/Rh groups on them.  They were a cute idea and I had an AB negative one, the most rare type!  I worked late so I had brought a giant salad with me because I knew I wouldn't be home.  Tomorrow they are having a happy hour at a local bar so I will probably make an appearance before I head home.

My weight this morning was 178.  Although I may not technically be following Whole30 to a "T," I don't plan on weighing at all during the month of May.  My Whole30 goals will be a little different.  I'm cutting out added sugar so this will include my precious vanilla soy milk.  I only drink 1/2 c. per day currently in my breakfast smoothie but I think it will be a good idea to cut back.  I can replace it with water and if they start tasting bad, I can throw in some plain powdered milk.  I'm debating on whether or not I should give up dairy.  I'll get back to you on that one.  It's hard to beat 14g protein in 1/2 c of cottage cheese.  I am also going to limit my fruit to 2 servings per day.  Strawberries in my morning smoothie and an apple or orange with lunch or after dinner.  We'll see how this goes.  I think it will be good for me.  Well, obviously, it can't be bad.

I will make sure to post my meals every day but there will be a lot of repeats, I'm sure.  

Tomorrow is Friday!  Fuck yeah!

WHATISHAPPENING?

I just found a tick...in my ear.  My fucking ear!

Luckily it was not the canal but the top part but still.  Now I am itching all over and I can't focus on my work. 

I trapped it in a test tube which is inside a ziploc just in case I get Rocky Mountain spotted fever. 

I guess that's what I get for wanting to walk in the woods yesterday.

Little bastard.

Tony, Tony Turn Around...

...Something's lost and can't be found!  If you are Catholic, you may recognize that one.  The thing that's lost is my motivation.  I think it was drained out of my body with the ickies I had his weekend.  Going to the gym this morning required a shit ton of effort on my part.  Just getting out of bed his morning felt like torture. Predictably, my work out was fucking terrible.  I manage to barely make it though DLs then crapped out on everything else.  I'm just not feeling it this week.  I think this may be hormonal because this sort of thing seems to happen every month.  Shark week is approaching...joy.  Ugh.  

Norma and her minions have posted about doing a Whole30 challenge in May.  I like the idea of this and I'd like to participate but I can't figure out a way to so it without eating meat, or eating very little at least.  Actually, now that I haven't been eating a lot of meat, it just does not sound very appetizing.  Sigh.  I need to do some more research.  I can't rely on nuts and eggs as my sole source of protein for a month.  I'm thinking of doing a modified version and just cutting out sugar, stevia and tofu.  It is going to require some planning but I think I can pull it off.  I think I also may need to reduce my fruit intake.  I'm probably eating more than I  should.  I'll be doing some reading today at work and come up with some goals. 

On a completely unrelated note, I would give my left nut (if I had nuts) for a giant bowl of half regular Cheerios and half Honey Nut Cheerios with ice cold milk. 

Yea, this is definitely hormones...

Oops...

So I've had an interesting past few days.  I think I picked up a bug at work and I had this vague weak and fatigued feeling all weekend.  It wasn't that bad, I still managed to make it to the gym.  But this morning it caught up with me.  Usually before I work out in the morning I eat a half a banana and a tablespoon of PB.  Well I still felt icky and kind of nauseous so I didn't eat it.  Terrible idea and I should have known better because I was thisclose to passing out.  So I went in the locker room to get my rescue pack of energy goo.  I choked it down with some water and the shakes went away but then I was exhausted.  I didn't finish my workout and called out sick from work.  I went home, managed to eat some oatmeal and I went back to bed.  I woke up 4 hours later feeling like I had risen from the dead. 

Ugh. What the fuck.  All this has happened before so I now have an appointment with a my GP doc tomorrow but I'm sure she will just refer me to an endocrinologist but I already have an appointment with one in May that I made back in February.  I had a glucose tolerance test a few years ago and it was normal so I don't know what to make of it. 

Anyway...Saturday I went out with some friends and I nursed two beers then switched to soda water with lime so it looked like I was drinking.  I didn't feel like a guilt trip from my friends about not drinking.  I used to be quite the party girl and was always more than willing to get shit faced.  I'm too fucking old for hangovers.  They fucking hurt and it takes me out for a good two days. 

The pic I attached is from a cookie that was brought into work by one of our research students.  She is from Saudi and brought some back with her.  I assume the "animal obesity" was lost in translation and it is actually lard or something similar.  And for the record, I did not have any.

Whooped

I just got home from an unexpected 14-hour day. 

Whew.

I'm going to bed and sleeping until Monday morning, or at least that's how I feel right now.

Lucky Duct

You know you're having a bad day when the highlight is an intact duct in the organ you are trying to perfuse.  This rarely happens in the particular procedure we did today but when it does it makes it a hell of a lot easier and allows us to avoid using an angiocath.

Anything that could have went wrong today went wrong.  I will be so happy to go to bed and put it all behind me.  Tomorrow is another early start.  I have to be at work, awake and alert at 6:30 am.  In order to make this, I will arrive at the gym at 5:00am when they open, bust through my workout so I can leave by 6.  Today turned out to be my rest day, by accident.  I slept through my alarm.  This hasn't happened since I was in college.  I had planned on swimming this morning but I guess my body needed the rest more.  Lift will happen tomorrow morning, swim on Saturday and a run/walk session with the Mister on Sunday.  

I will be stuck in the lab most of the day tomorrow, again.  I usually don't mind doing lab work all day but when I've got a billion other responsibilities, it kinda blows.  But, I was promoted to lead tech for a reason so I have to suck it up.  I'm thankful I am paid by the hour though because the overtime is awesome.  

Time for bed.  The 4:15 alarm will ring early.  I will be setting two alarms to make sure my ass gets out of bed.  

Murphy's Law

Well today is a complete and utter clusterfuck...

The lab I work in has a reputation of being a giant clusterfuck and today it is ringing true.  The shit hits the fan every fucking day like clockwork.  Something goes wrong every single day.  I'm not exaggerating.  The fuck up of the day today is a supply we desperately need tomorrow went on backorder 4 weeks ago and nobody in the ordering department bothered to tell us because they fucking hate my boss because he treats everybody like shit. 

Fuck.  So now we have to change our procedure and hope to God it will arrive before 10 tomorrow so we can still actually use it. 

Sonofabitch